Monday, December 15, 2008

Dear Santa ...

This is my letter to Santa Clause this Christmas:

Dear Santa,

You know I don't ask for much. I have my needs pretty well met and I am satisfied with life right now. But, just because it's Christmas - and because I have been a good girl this year - I have a few requests that I would like to humbly make.

1. Santa, would you please talk to your "elves" in various major shopping venues about placing anything that has Disney Princesses or Disney Cars directly in the line of sight of my children. I can't walk through a store without hearing a "Mommmmmyyyyyyyyy" or a loud gasp followed by a high-pitched whine from my offspring. Thanks, that would be most helpful.

2. Since Father Time is one of your good friends, would you please ask him to provide a few more hours a day. Especially this time of year a little more time would be most useful in getting the shopping done, the Christmas cards sent, the decorating completed, the blog posts written, the holiday crafts crafted, the cookies baked ... and a few moments of peace and quiet would be well received too.

3. The Muter 2008. I would love nothing more than the newest model of this remote control. Not only will being able to mute my constantly talking daughter, my crying son, and barking dog bring me some element of sanity, it will greatly improve my marriage and relationship with my family.

4. Would you please see if your workshop can develop a hat that my son can't take off in frigid, cold weather; and a pair of glasses that my daughter will love to wear all the time.

5. If you are looking for any last minute stocking stuffers for me. A collection of immune boosters and cold remedies would be great. Better yet, the cure for the common cold and Fibromyalgia! It would be nice not to feel so miserable all the time.

Thank you Santa!

Humbly yours,


Zil said...

Sounds like your Muter 2008 needs to have a Dookie Deterrent button.

Kelly said...

Excellent idea! People and animals that don't make noise OR poop. I'll have to mention that to Santa next year.